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Let’s Try “YES!”

 
Kids live most of their waking hours under the watchful eyes of an adult with an agenda. Eat this, not that. Take that off, put this on. Stop doing this, start doing that. Move faster, eat slower. Talk quieter, play quieter. It must feel frustrating and powerless to be so enthralled with life only to be shut down when you follow your curiosity, exert your independence or test your strength.

The next time you realize you are saying “No” just because you can… try saying yes. I’ll try it over here too and we can all report back on how it goes.

Happiness > Success

“Few parents have the courage and independence to care more for their children’s happiness than for their success.” – Alfie Kohn

I’ve been listening to “Unconditional Parenting” over the last week and it has resonated with my heart and my core beliefs about motherhood, children, and people in general. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised as Kohn was one of the first authors to deeply impact my teaching pedagogy. His books examine how we can be punished by rewards and the negative effect it has on our children when they believe we like or love them conditionally based on meeting our standards of appropriate behavior.

I’m curious about other people’s opinion. Do you believe punishment is necessary? Did you grow up feeling like your parents’ love was somewhat conditional on meeting certain expectations? If given the choice, would you choose happiness or success for your children?

 

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